Pet Peeves
You can’t copyright title. But you know you wouldn’t have named your product What A Curl Wants if not for my song. So pay me.
Before I get started with my short list let me just say I often wish I named my cat “Peeve” so I could have an actual pet named Peeve.
Ok, here goes….
Picking my brain
Please don’t ask if you can do this. The visual alone brings to mind monkeys grooming each other or a woodpecker pecking at my head. Ask instead if we can have a brief talk about the business over lunch. I might not respond. I might not say yes. But at least I won’t be grossed out by the ask.
Fat free is not low fat
Servers that say they have low fat milk and then bring me skim. If I wanted skim I’d ask for skim. Or fat free. If you don’t have it just say you don’t have it or the clever server could bring me skim and whole milk and I could self-combine. I’m picky. I know. But I only have 1 cuppa coffee a day and it matters.
“It is what it is”
Well, what is it? It’s probably not what it is. You’re just being lazy.
Tapping
At NYC subway turnstiles you can only tap on the right. I’m sure this was designed with righties in mind. NY has more of them. The world has more of them. I get it. So I put forth that there be one lane for lefties at each turnstile so we can tap without having to do any cross-body choreography. It’s only fair.
Run-on texts without punctuation
We all know how ridiculous it feels to say “period” or “question mark” when dictating into our phones especially in public but the thing is omitting them makes it tedious for the receiver to decipher the message where the thoughts start and end was it a question or a statement it puts the onus on me and that is inconsiderate of the sender. See? wasn’t that annoying?
Paying for parking
If I’m going to drop a few hundred at the mall they should pay me to park. Not the other way around.
Speaking of parking
Huge cars in compact spots
NOT OK!
The cyber truck
I was behind one recently and it occurred to me that those pointy bits were at the exact level as my windshield and that if we ever had an accident on the freeway I’d be demolished and they’d be ok. Then it turned the corner without using a directional. And then it proceeded to roll through a stop sign.
Tipflation
When I get my car washed I tip the car washers and the car dryers. Now there’s a tip tray at the register for the gal taking my money for the wash.
Screens Screens and More Screens
There didn’t used to be but now there are screens atop the ellipticals and treadmills at my gym so that instead of staring out at the blue sky I have no choice but to face a screen. Even if I turn it off it’s still there. If I were 6’2” this wouldn’t matter but most people are not.
And speaking of the gym….
Pads in sports bras
When did this start? It’s so ridiculous. If I don’t have pads in my sports bra I look shapeless compared to the others gals. In addition they fall out in the dryer and I waste a good 10 minutes stuffing them back into those teeny little holes on the sides of the bra. Commutatively that’s about an hour a week. Crazy use of time. I no longer give a shit. I removed them all and threw them away.
Lastly: Martinis not made to specifications
I dedicated an entire Blog to this a few months ago. Read it here.
I feel better now. These are good peeves to have. It was fun getting them off my chest. As soon as I press send I’m going to think of 100 more.
Oh and … I’m not angry. I’m a happy cynic. There’s a difference. Hey, It is what it is.😬
Feel free to share a peeve or two of your own. You’ll see. It feels great!
******
PS: If you happen to be on the south shore of Long Island on July 25th, come say hi at the Freeport Memorial Library! !
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